


Contact for Proof

by Elizabeth Culmer (edenfalling)



Series: Alpha Timeline Fluff [13]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cross-Generational Friendship, Epistolary, Female Friendship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Foreshadowing, Friendship, Gen, Illustrated, Illustrations, Letters, Prompt Fic, Subtext
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-26
Updated: 2014-10-26
Packaged: 2018-02-22 18:41:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2517863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/edenfalling/pseuds/Elizabeth%20Culmer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dear Ms. Lalonde, my name is Jane and I met your daughter online last month...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is a combined response to two kinkmeme prompts. The [major prompt](http://homesmut.dreamwidth.org/39716.html?thread=45873700#cmt45873700), by [random_gal](http://random_gal.dreamwidth.org), was for Jane contacting either Rose or Dave to assuage her doubts that Roxy and Dirk are actually related to them. The [minor prompt](http://homesmut.dreamwidth.org/38671.html?thread=40194831#cmt40194831) was for Jane meeting either Rose or Dave in person and striking up a conversation about their child that they've never met.
> 
> I formatted the fic as a series of image files because I thought it would be visually interesting. The second chapter contains a text-only version for anyone who is using e-readers, is reading on a small screen, has trouble parsing cursive fonts, or just doesn't want to bother with images. (You will have to disable the work skin, though, since I did use pesterlog formatting.)
> 
> Full prompt texts are in the end notes.

  


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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **1.[Alpha Strider-Lalondes & Jane, Contact for Proof](http://homesmut.dreamwidth.org/39716.html?thread=45873700#cmt45873700)** , requested by [random_gal](http://random_gal.dreamwidth.org)
> 
> Jane Crocker hears about her friends' parents. It isn't as though her heiress status isn't hard to believe itself, but she isn't certain if they're really related. So she contacts Dave or Rose and asks them about it.
> 
> It can range from them not daring to contact the Crockercorp heir, not being aware of their kids, knowing and responding, or even Jane acting as a go between for the future and the present under the guise of neither adult having a pesterchum.
> 
>  **2.[Jane + Alpha Dave or Rose, background sadness](http://homesmut.dreamwidth.org/38671.html?thread=40194831#cmt40194831)** , requested by anonymous
> 
> Jane meets either Alpha Dave or Alpha Rose at a SBAHJ movie premiere/ _Complacency of the Learned_ book signing/whatever. And Jane is so happy to meet one of her friends' guardians that she of course strikes up a conversation about the friend in question.
> 
> So Jane ends up having a very strange conversation with either Alpha Dave or Alpha Rose that is full of hidden meaning, and while she might get suspicious, she never learns that the guardian in question has never actually met their kid, no matter how oddly they react to some of the stuff she says/what weird stuff they ask her.
> 
> Bonus points for Jane talking to Dirk or Roxy about it afterwards without realizing how goddamn tragic the stuff she's telling them is.


	2. Text Version

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the chapter title states, this is the text version of the fic. I did include the non-letter images, but they should all have text descriptions underneath. :-)

Saturday, 10/22/05

Dear Ms. Lalonde,

My name is Jane and I met your daughter online last month. My Dad says it's polite to let parents know who their children are associating with, so I'm writing to say hello and promise that I'm not secretly a serial killer. Roxy said I didn't need to bother because you never check up on her, but I've never had a real friend before and I want to do it right.

If Roxy was lying about being your daughter, I'm sorry for bothering you. I can talk about your books instead! I just finished reading the first three books in _The Complacency of the Learned_. They're awfully long and I had to look up a bunch of words, but I liked how Calmasis worked hard to discover the terrible secrets of the wizards' school and inspired the Disciples to stand up to Zazzerpan even though the rest of the world was pretending nothing was wrong. Also, the wizards' beards were neat. Mustaches would be even better, though. Will there be any wizards with mustaches instead of beards in the fourth book?

If Roxy is your daughter, I should tell you about myself. I am nine years old and I live in Washington state. I'm not supposed to tell people my actual address because of corporate espionage and other nasty shenanigans, which is why I didn't write it on the envelope, but maybe you can figure it out? Roxy says you're scary good at knowing all kinds of secrets, and that it's because you use black majyyks, which isn't actually a word but she spells things wrong a lot.

I like to figure out secrets too, because I'm going to be a detective when I grow up, at least until I take over the family business. This letter can be a secret between us if you want, or you can tell Roxy. It's up to you!

Sincerely,  
Jane Crocker

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_Wednesday the Sixteenth of November, 2005_

_Dear Ms. Crocker,_

_Roxy is indeed my daughter. I trust her to manage her own circle of online contacts, but I confess I am pleased to learn that she has chosen such a conscientious and considerate friend. I hope she has made a favorable impression on you despite her occasionally unconventional spelling habits._

_As you can see, I have unearthed your address, though I leave the elucidation of my methods as an exercise for the discerning mind. Should you wish to continue this correspondence, you know how to reach me._

_Finally, I will tell you a secret: the manuscript on which I am currently working contains a wizard who eschews the traditional beard in favor of a most luxuriant mustache._

_Yours,  
Rose Lalonde_

\-----

Saturday, 11/26/05

Dear Ms. Lalonde,

My Dad was surprised when he found your letter in our mailbox, but then he laughed and said he should have expected you to find us. Do you know my family?

Roxy is my best friend! Well, she's one of my three best friends. The others are Dirk and Jake, and I promise they're not serial killers either. Roxy is very funny. She likes to recommend books and video games for me to try, and talks about her cats and her neighbors. I guess she sees them a lot since she's homeschooled. I started homeschooling this year, but my neighbors don't have kids and they don't do anything besides go to work all day. I know that can't be the whole truth, but Dad says it's not polite to spy through other people's windows so I was very bored until I met Roxy online. She always cheers me up when I feel glum.

I don't know how you found my address. I know we're not in the phone directory and we don't show up in online searches. My Grandmother makes sure of that. But the post office knows how to find us, so maybe you read it in the code stickers they put on the envelopes? I can't read those. Do you need a special machine to translate them?

I am very excited about the wizard with the mustache! I hope you finish writing the book soon.

Oh, and I hope you had a happy Thanksgiving. I sent Roxy a recipe for pumpkin pie and told her she should ask you to help bake it. I don't like them as much as apple pies, but they're still delicious, and any pie tastes better when you make it and share it with family.

Sincerely,  
Jane Crocker

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_Thursday the Fifteenth of December, 2005_

_Dear Ms. Crocker,_

_Your grandfather made an offer to purchase the movie rights to the Complacency shortly after the publication of the first volume. I regret that I did not get the chance to know him outside of that inconclusive business overture._

_I am glad to hear that you and Roxy are such fast friends, and that you have other friends as well. She rarely confides in me, which is an admirable sign of self-reliance in a young lady, but I am grateful for the small window onto her inner life that your letters have provided._

_Your postal code theory is sound, though inaccurate. Remember to keep your mind open to all possibilities._

_As for the fourth book, when I said I was working on the manuscript, I meant that I was revising some small things in response to an old friend's comments. The text is now in the hands of my editor and publisher, and I believe the hardcover edition will be available for purchase in April._

_Thanksgiving was quiet here. Thank you for sending Roxy the recipe._

_Yours,  
Rose Lalonde_

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Saturday, 12/24/05

Dear Ms. Lalonde,

You're welcome for the recipe. I'm glad you and Roxy could enjoy pumpkin pie together! I know this won't reach you until after Christmas, but I hope you and Roxy have a great time with lots of presents and maybe even snow.

Writing a book sounds awfully complicated. I thought they were printed as soon as authors finished writing! What takes up all the time? But I don't mind very much. My birthday is in April, so now I will ask for your book as a birthday present.

I don't know if I should tell you very much about what Roxy and I get up to. If I'm not allowed to peek into my neighbors' windows, I probably shouldn't help you peek into Roxy's windows. Even if they're not actual windows. It feels like I'd be breaking a confidence, and that's a dirty, rotten, no-good thing to do.

But I'm sure Roxy would talk to you if you asked her! She loves talking and she really likes to make people happy. Which I'm sure you know, but one of a detective's jobs is to point out obvious things that people overlook by accident, so I think it's ok to remind you.

If you didn't read the postage stickers, I'm not sure how you found my address. Maybe you are a leet hacker like Roxy. Maybe you really do use dark majyyks. Or maybe you hired a private detective! It took a while for you to write back the first time, after all. Are any of those answers correct?

Sincerely,  
Jane Crocker

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_Friday the Thirteenth of January, 2006_

_Dear Ms. Crocker,_

_You are quite correct that sharing Roxy's secrets without her permission would be unethical. It was inappropriate of me to hint otherwise, though I dare to hope you will forgive a mother her concern for her daughter's happiness. You are a fine and upstanding young woman, and I trust that you will retain those qualities as you voyage through the storms and shoals of life._

_You are doing an excellent job as a detective thus far, though I shall refrain from either confirming or denying your theories until you provide more evidence for them._

_Might I ask what other mysteries have caught your attention over the years? I am always on the lookout for new sources of inspiration, both for the Complacency and for occasional short stories._

_I will be embarking upon a promotional tour in support of the book release. It is entirely possible I may be in Washington in April and can autograph the latest volume for you in person._

_Yours,  
Rose Lalonde_

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Saturday, 1/21/06

Dear Ms. Lalonde,

I've investigated lots of mysteries, but they're mostly small ones. Things like what happened to Mr. Sheldon's cat, or who kept setting off firecrackers every Friday night last summer. The answers are that Jellybean ran away and found a boy cat and had kittens in the park, and Vanessa and Veronica Lau were making a science fiction film about aliens secretly taking over the earth by buying all the movie studios and brainwashing people into zombies, except for a few who fought back. They used the fireworks for special effects.

My Dad helped me get the kittens to a local shelter so they can be adopted. He says Vanessa and Veronica aren't allowed to babysit me anymore, though, which is no fair.

My birthday is April 13! It seems like it will take forever between now and then, but I would very much like to meet you. Will you bring Roxy with you on the tour? It's not like she'd miss school or anything.

Also, you can call me Jane!

Sincerely,  
Jane Crocker

\-----

_Tuesday the Fourteenth of February, 2006_

_Dear Jane,_

_Those sound like fascinating mysteries. I offer my retroactive congratulations to you for solving them, and also my hope that you will find many more interesting yet harmless conundrums to investigate. If you wish, you may tell your father that in my opinion he is being overzealous by banishing your former babysitters. His worry for your safety is understandable, but children cannot be sheltered from every potential source of distress, and I think the creativity they showed outweighs their cavalier attitude toward fireworks._

_Alas, Roxy will not accompany me. Doubtless this will sound hypocritical after the preceding paragraph, but there are safety concerns. I receive regular threats whose import ranges from laughable to serious and would prefer that my daughter remain in the security of her own home._

_Additionally, I think you fail to grasp precisely how boring signing tours are. One rarely has time to stop and breathe, let alone see anything of interest; it is simply, to quote the great Chuck Berry, "a train and a room, and a car and a room, and a room and a room," and makes one feel altogether caught in a strait-jacket. I would be remiss to inflict that upon anyone I love._

_The publication treadmill itself proceeds apace. I have the galley proofs of volume four, and the advanced reading copies have been sent to the appropriate gray eminences for reviews and dust jacket quotations. I apologize for not thinking to ask if you would like an ARC; by this point they are all spoken for. Still, this means you will see the book in all its dark glory, without any of the last-minute imperfections that are even now being smoothed away._

_I have arranged to be at Maple Books on the twelfth of April, for the third stop on my publicity tour. There will be a reading at one o'clock, followed by a brief question-and-answer session, followed by a signing. I look forward to seeing you there._

_Yours,  
Rose Lalonde_

_P.S. If you wish, you may address me as Ms. or Aunt Rose, though I do not insist on such familiarity if you wish otherwise._

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Saturday, 2/25/06

Dear Ms. Rose,

I'm sorry it took me so long to write back to you! I get awfully excited about Valentine's Day, since it's a really big holiday for Crockercorp and I like to give cupcakes to everybody I see. I had ridiculous heaps of cupcakes left over this year since I'm not going to public school anymore, and I had to figure out cunning plans to distribute them. I asked Roxy for ideas and she came up with the best one. (Dirk and Jake helped a little, but Dirk's sense of humor is weird and Jake lives on a private island. They don't understand how to deal with neighbors.)

I have a secret identity now! I'm the Masked Cupcake Avenger of Maple Valley. I ring people's doorbells, then duck behind a bush and watch them as they find a plate of cupcakes on their sidewalk. It's hard work but also a lot of fun. Everybody likes cupcakes.

Oh, that reminds me! Would you like me to bring a cake to your signing? What flavors do you like best? What design would you like on the frosting? I can't draw very well, but I can probably make a chess piece or a wizard beard.

I'm awfully glad to hear that the book will be published on time, and I'm looking forward to seeing you, too. It's sad that Roxy won't be coming with you. Are you sure she couldn't fly out just for this one stop? But if that wouldn't work out, can I give you something to bring home for her? It can be a secret between you and me, like our letters were at first.

Sincerely,  
Jane Crocker

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_Thursday the Sixteenth of March, 2006_

_Dear Jane,_

_I can have no complaints about the frequency of your correspondence when, as you can plainly see, it takes me an average of three weeks to return your own letters. I am simply pleased to hear that you and Roxy have been enjoying yourselves. From my brief impression of your grandfather, I suspect he would have approved your recent career in surreptitious baked good vigilantism._

_I would be honored to receive a cake from you. I ask only that you make it from scratch rather than from one of your grandmother's commercial mixes. You will doubtless think me superstitious, but I have always felt that a cook's intentions come across in her food, and I'm sure anything you bake on your own will be entirely delicious. Decorate it as you see fit._

_I will, of course, take and deliver any items you wish to give my daughter. I suggest that you refrain from sending perishable goods, as the transport time may be prohibitive._

_Yours,  
Rose Lalonde_

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Saturday, 3/25/06

Dear Ms. Rose,

Do you really think my Poppop would have been proud of me? My Dad always says so, but he's proud of me all the time no matter what I do. I think he's biased.

I will definitely make you a cake from scratch. That's how I learned to bake a few years ago, because my Dad agrees with you that it's more special that way. I think I will make a chocolate cake, because of the grimdark majyyks Roxy always says you practice. She is very funny sometimes! But I think chocolate is splendid even though magic is not a real thing.

I hope this letter reaches you before you leave on your tour!

Sincerely,  
Jane Crocker

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[A ticket stub, on which is printed: ADMIT ONE COMPLACE]

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_To Jane Crocker: baker, detective, hero, friend_

_May your cupcakes remain delicious  
May you find the truth you seek  
May your courage keep you strong  
You are never alone_

_Rose Lalonde_

[A drawing, in purple marker, of a curled mustache]

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[A large manila envelope with a white label, on which is printed: _ROXY: DO NOT OPEN THIS UNTIL APRIL 13TH 2420_ ]

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_Wednesday the Twelfth of April, 2006_

_Dear Roxy,_

_As you doubtless know from other sources, today I met Jane Crocker at a book signing. She gave me the enclosed letter and gift to pass on to you. I will do my best, with Dave Strider's aid, to ensure that they survive the ravages of the intervening years._

_I will not maintain contact with her after today. If she asks why I have stopped answering her letters, please give her my regrets and whatever excuse seems most plausible to you. Your view is less clouded, and I trust your judgment._

_Although Jane has been commendably discreet for her age, I have appreciated the brief and limited window she provided onto your life. I wish that I could be there for you. I wish that I could leave you a bright and undamaged world. But some things are written, rail against them as we may._

_I remain, as always,_

_Your loving mother,  
Rose Lalonde_

_P.S. The second enclosed letter is for Jane herself. Please give it to her after you and your friends enter the Medium._

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[A white envelope, on which is written: To Roxy Lalonde, on her unbirthday!]  


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Wednesday, 4/12/06

Dear Roxy,

I know you want to keep our friendship online where you can use your leet haxxing to keep your mother from seeing what you're up to, but I wanted to send you a real letter at least once. Besides, your mother is awfully cool! I've been writing to her for a few months now, and I think whatever problems you two have are just a big misunderstanding. She's always asking about you and hoping you're happy.

I'm sending you this as a real letter because your copy of Mario Kart: Double Dash!! broke last month. I still think your mother would replace it if you asked, but I've been reading lots of fantasy to get ready for volume four of _The Complacency of the Learned_ , and I wanted to celebrate my birthday like a hobbit. So I'm sending you a replacement game myself. It's too bad we can't play it together, since you live so far away.

Also, here is a picture of a cupcake, because you are my Cupcake Avenger sidekick!

[A drawing, in marker, of a chocolate cupcake with pink frosting]

Your friend,  
Jane

\-----

  
[A white envelope, on which is written: _Jane Crocker, Maid of Life_ ]  


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_Friday the Eleventh of November, 2011_

_Dear Jane,_

_I am leaving this letter in Roxy's care. By the time you receive and read it, I will be long dead._

_I wanted to apologize for vanishing from your life so abruptly. I did receive your letters after our meeting, and I appreciated your honest opinions on my work. It was not, however, safe for us to remain in contact. The Baroness has little tolerance for opposition, and less for rebellion from those she considers her own. Jade English's fate made that abundantly clear to me._

_Thank you for the brief window you opened into my daughter's life. Thank you for being her friend. Thank you for giving me hope for the future beyond our own universe's death._

_I wish you the best of luck, now and always._

_Yours,  
Rose Lalonde_


End file.
